Gaia Community: Kundan's Blog

I am giving Free Hugs tomorrow!!! :) :) :)

http://iloveyou.gaia.com — Mon, 19 Oct 2009 19:18:30 GMT

So, to celebrate the launch and release of my new book, Secretly Loved: How to be Your Own Secret Admirer, to be released on Valentine's Day 2010, I am giving free hugs, tomorrow! Yup. I am gonna be on Ring Road tomorrow on the campus of University of California, Irvine, with a big free hugs sign, giving hugs to anyone who wants one. From 12:30PM to 3:30 PM PDT.

I figured this is a perfect way to promote my book since this is what the book is all about - instead of waiting for someone to come and save me or "attracting my soulmate", it is about experiecing Love in the Now, right here, right now. I kind of also want to create a movement around the book, and so I would really appreciate if everyone who reads this also gives free hugs tomorrow, even if it was not with a free hugs sign, but simply something as simple as walking up to a complete stranger in coffee shop, and asking, "Would you like a hug?" And hugging that person if he says yes. Yup, get out of your comfort zone too. Or even something as simple as going up to a stranger and saying, "Hi! I don't know you, but I just wanted to say that you look really beautiful!" It will make someone's day! :) :) :)

Tags: love, free hugs, hugs, joy, peace, the Now, Divine, God, Irvine, U.C.Irvine

One Light, One Love. :) :) :)

http://iloveyou.gaia.com — Wed, 30 Sep 2009 22:13:35 GMT

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Two Ways to Live Life

http://iloveyou.gaia.com — Fri, 18 Sep 2009 18:10:16 GMT

There are 2 ways to live life - believe there is something to protect and defend - and thus also believe there are some things you have to do to protect and defend - some healers, for example, believe that they can't touch others too much, or else, their energy would be 'drained' or that they would absorb the other person's 'negative energy' - and thus they believe they must wash themselves with salt water after too much touching, or do a number of other things - I know, I was one of those healers - but there is only so much you can do to defend - in the end, it is too tiring to keep defending and protecting - sooner or later, I always got seriously sick.

And then I realized - it is so much simpler to believe that I have NOTHING to defend - because, now I have NOTHING to do to defend my self. Life is so much more simple now.

:)

May Everyone Experience True Reality some day!

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What helps you deepen into the present moment?

http://iloveyou.gaia.com — Thu, 10 Sep 2009 12:49:37 GMT

Meditation
Guided Visualization and Feelingilization.
Love
Massage
Sometimes, writing.

Tags: Q&R, relaxation, presence, present moment

What was the happiest thing you saw this past week?

http://iloveyou.gaia.com — Mon, 07 Sep 2009 07:51:04 GMT

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eHM8bwoNitc

Tags: Q&R, happiness, happy, joy

The Best Shower of My Life

http://iloveyou.gaia.com — Wed, 02 Sep 2009 22:57:24 GMT

I look at these droplets of water falling from the shower - somehow, they shimmer with, as Love, and when each drop touches me, I feel so loved and loving, and I feel like I am Love itself, and so is the water, and so it is like Love touching Love, Love kissing Love, Love massaging Love, Love soothing Love, Love, caressing Love. I feel each drop fall over the strands of my hair, my shoulders, my neck, my arms, the hairs on my arms, my chest, my nipples, my stomach, my hands, my thighs, my balls, my dick, the hairs around my manhood, my legs, my knees, my ankles, my toes, my feet - I feel it all in sensual detail, and I feel pleasure like I have never felt before, and somehow, I feel like I feel all this not because the water is there and I am here, and the water hits me - no, it is more like, I feel it because I AM the water also. It is the same when I look at the water droplets or hear the sound - it is not like the water is there and I am here, and I am looking - I see it because I AM It. I hear it because I AM it too. And it is as if the water droplets are alive, and that they have an intention, and only one intention - Love - and this love is expressed as giving me pleasure, feel-good sensations all over my skin and organs, especially my heart - this love is also expressed as beautiful lights around the water droplets for my viewing pleasure - this love is also esxpressed as soothing sounds when the waters touch my body and even the tub below.
It all started when I looked at a flower - normally, this is how we perceive the 'outside' world - I am here, and there is a flower over there, and I am not the flower, and the flower is not me. I am here, a separate being, looking at, through the sense of sight, through the retinas behind my eyes, a separate flower, outside of me. But what I perceived that moment was much deeper than that. It is hard to explain but I shall anyway.
What I felt was that when I looked at the flower, I was, in a sense, becoming the flower, or a part of me was becoming the flower, and the flower, or a part of the flower, was becoming me, and there was this merging of energy, and this was why I 'saw' the flower - but this time the flower was far more radiant and beautiful than usual - not only the flower, but even the leaves and the stems around the flower, and the dirt on the ground too! And in addition, I also 'felt' this energy coming from the flower towards me, and this energy moving from me towards the flower.

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Sweetness

http://iloveyou.gaia.com — Sun, 30 Aug 2009 20:57:40 GMT

Sweetness flowing into me, through me, and a long, complicated, at times, very simple, arduous journey takes place - Pan's mischievousness brushes past Cupid's bow on her face, lips touch, tongues twist, rivers collide, arms around each other, rain pours down - I playfully hit her on the arms, and she squeals, "Ow!!!" and she sounds so cute, and I massage away the area on the arm I had hit, and she says, delightfully, " That feels so good!" So I tickle her, and she laughs and writhes and squirms and moves her body all over the place, like a little girl, and it is like the day the formless first became form - jaw-dropping, awe-inspiring...

I look into her eyes. Deep, soothing tears flow. She disappears. We disappear.

Finally, sweetness flows

As me,

As her,

And without me , without her,

And there is

Only

Sweetness.

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Daring New Forms of Love

http://iloveyou.gaia.com — Wed, 26 Aug 2009 19:31:27 GMT

Marriage Clone

Serial Marriages

The Triangle

For example, a woman in her late thirties, a computer whiz and part-time masseuse, lives in a household with both her current love and her former lover. Her former lover, now a a good friend gives her present lover counsel on how to treat her, explaining where he made mistakes, talking about the atttibutes which her current lover has which make him MORE fit for the job of loving her well. He speaks of himself as the guardian angel to their relationship. "I somehow always understood, even when I was with her," he says, "that I wasn't to be hers forever. I was there to enjoy her and to carry through a few things, but in actuality, I was just a stop on her way to her real destination."

"We'are all having an amazing, beautiful time," says the woman. "It has to be known that two people who love the same person don't have to be enemies. Somebody's got to start living this out and showing how it can work."

In their particular situation, they all support one another in a larger vessel of love. Ordinarily, in the world of personality, men compete with one another for the affections of a single woman, not only in the moment of trying to capture her, but even in retrospect. These two gentlemen, both STRONG and GENTLE men, are dissolving the archaic pattern of the male combative mode. In loving this woman together, they also embrace one another as men, which, for each of them, has been a movement toward spiritual expansion.

As their story shows, the soul is always interested in bringing us together. It isn't interested in hierarchies or egos. It keeps saying that love is all that matters. It keeps showing, through each of our little experiences, that if only we can open our hearts just a little bit wider, more love can flow in with every transaction.

Love is ease, love is grace. When we have to worry about such things as "I loved her first", or "I loved her better", or "She left me, so nobody else can have her," we keep constricting ourselves emotionally, physically, spiritually. Constriction takes energy. It wears us out. But each time we can expland, relax, and let more love in, we find a greater sense of ease, because we have nothing to defend, protect, or bark about. This is where we're all going, but it takes courage to get there. These people, who are doing it so comfortably, are lighting a candle and showing the way. They have tasted of the true grace which, expanded to infinity, is absolute seamless ease. It is love.

(I'd say the relationships betweem Juan Antonio, Cristina and Maria Elena in the movie Vicky Cristina Barcelona is another beautiful example of the Triangle).

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Double Duo

Same-Sex Marriage

Cross-Gender Departures

Cross-Generational Marriages

The Parent-Child Bond

Friendship

The Sacred Circle of Friends

There will also be a form of communal relationship that I call the Wheel or the Sacred Circle of Friends. In this configuration, rather than having a single spouse, domestic partner, or main squeeze, an individual will have a collection of loved ones and friends who comprise his or her relationship life. In these formats, each person will be the hub of his own wheel, surrounded by a number of people, each of whom serves relationship function - the confided-in friend, the person who shares some financial burden, the occasional or serial lover, or the practical helpmate. Instead of this group being viewed as a stand-in for a "real relationship", this constellation of people will be celebrated as a bounteous gift, acknowledged as a relationship form in itself.

Vincent, a man in his forties, is a person whose entire relationship life, has been happily lived in this form. Although he has an occasional lover, this wheel is his relationship of record.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Emotional Spouse

Social Pairings

Voluntary Separations

The Solo

The Relationship Monk

Intentional Community

from The Future of Love by Daphne Rose Kingma

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True Monogamy: MonoAmory by Choice

http://iloveyou.gaia.com — Mon, 17 Aug 2009 04:34:23 GMT

There are 2 aspects to this -

1. Many people are polyamourous by definition of the word because they tend to have deep bonded relationships with people other than their partners/spouses. This class of people do not indulge in guiltfreesex with their non partners tho.

2. The second class of polyamourous people have moved on from being possessive and sexually jealous about their partners and are secure enough about their inherent love for each other to allow themselves and their partners to explore aspects of themselves that cannot be explored in a monoamourous relationship.

This class of people, DOES have guiltfreesex with people they love who are not their partners and they are open/authentic/trusting enough of themselves and their partners to not become insecure about themselves or their current relationship. They tend to also have stronger bonds because their relationship allows themselves the FREEDOM to explore themselves without repurcussions :)

People who are monoamourous by choice inspite of the FREEDOM to explore new frontiers are the only true monogamous folk. Such folk have likely explored this aspect in reality in some depth (not just in thought) but decided they preferred monoamory.

Monoamorous people who are afraid to explore themselves or allow their partners to do so come from a space of insecurity and lack. This is not monoamory, it is more likely a marriage of 2 unhappy joyless individuals denying themselves the opportunity of authenticity.

Since "sex" and its associated connotations is a point of contention for many, many polyamorous relationships remain shy of indulging the physical aspect of the relationship.

Lastly, how is it possible to NOT love many people without rejecting your infinite capacity of love?

by Sougat Garai

Tags: monogamy, polyamory, love, joy, marriage, authenticity, monoamory

Repost - Matthew's blog on Love

http://iloveyou.gaia.com — Thu, 13 Aug 2009 19:14:58 GMT

http://matthew.gaia.com/blog/2009/8/the-more-love-i-give-the-more-i-have-to-give

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The Most Beautiful Answer to an Interesting Question

http://iloveyou.gaia.com — Thu, 13 Aug 2009 18:45:48 GMT

Who Around you do you consider wise?

This is one of those questions where I'd rather show you, than tell, my answer.

I'd rather take you by the hand and lead you outside, away from your computer, away from any pressures, away from any troubling stories or news or worries or concerns, and into a more timeless world of seasons and cycles and peace.

I'd rather dance with you to somewhere still and quiet, deep into a sun-dappled forest, weaving through trees, where the only sounds are birdsong, and the rustling of branches and the rhythm of our footsteps.

I'd rather discover with you a lake, still and blue and calm, with a warm and smooth expanse of rock leading out into it.

I'd rather we both make our way out on this natural bridge, to lie on our bellies with our hands trailing into the water, and I'd rather point to your reflection, to you-and not just any you, but you when you feel the most relaxed and trusting and happy and comfortable, and you when you feel most loved.

by Siona

Thanks so much, Siona! I just had to repost this on my blog since it is so awesome! :)

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The Soul's Dream for Us: An Unsual Love Story

http://iloveyou.gaia.com — Sun, 09 Aug 2009 05:27:15 GMT

This insistence to discovery will be present, whether a given relationship seems "ordinary" - that is, a conventional marriage - or extraordinary - doesn't conform to the social dictates of daily, domestic, exclusive, or forever. Either way, our relationships are calling us to a world of larger truth and greater love.

We're directed to this high calling even when our relationships end. For example, I know a man, John, married seventeen years, who'd been sensing the oncoming end of his marriage for some time. Although he and his wife, Susan, had never been particularly unhappy, it seemed, as he said, that they had already given each other all that they had meant to give, and he felt that for his own growth, he needed to move on.

He wasn't sure if his need was of a spiritual nature, or if it meant having another intimate partner, but he was clear that the time for their parting had come. When he told Susan, she was initially heartbroken, but, as she, too, realized that in spite of their love for each other, they had gone as far as they could go together. She had supported John in discovering and establishing his career; he had helped her gain a sense of self-esteem. But both of them now seemed stuck in their lives and their relationship was just a holding pattern.

After one of these powerful truth-telling sessions, they went home and made love, and in the tear-streaked aftermath agreed that over the next several months they'd take the necessary steps to effect their separation.

They started to do this, but within seven weeks Susan discovered, to her amazement, that she was pregnant. Having been unable to conceive during all the years of their marriage, she was both delighted and thrown off balance by this discovery. After thinking about it at length and then talking it over, they both decided, in spite of their imminent divorce, to go ahead and have the baby and share in their child's financial support and parenting. In spite of this ironic timing, they both agreed that this remarkable turn of events in no way changed the fact that THEIR marriage was over.

Over the next several months, John and Susan helped each other set up new living arrangements. Meanwhile, throughout her pregnancy, John attended birthing classes with her and together they consulted a lawyer about their forthcoming divorce.

On the day they were to sign the final papers for their divorce, Susan went into labor. Bypassing the lawyer's office, John rushed to the hospital to assist her in the birth. Later that evening, they drank champagne in her hospital room, rejoiced in the arrival of their daughter, and signed the papers for their divorce.

As astonishing and untoward as this divorce appeared to be, it held a high purpose for all the people affected by it. Two years later Susan married a divorced man with 2 sons who moved happily into the role of having a little sister, while, John, who'd been a real estate executive, completely revamped his life by totally withdrawing from his professional responsibilities. He took a long time off, hiking and meditating in the mountains, taking instruction in a number of spiritual disciplines. Finally, he went on a series of spiritual pilgrimages. Over time, his focus shifted from his outer to his inner life.

As time went on, their daughter was revealed to be a remarkably unusual child, highly attracted to animals and birds, deeply intuitive. Although her mother and stepfather provided her with family and security, they were unable to support her spiritual emergence, but because he had been on a spiritual journey of his own, John was able to provide her with comfort and direction.

The personality would shudder self-righteously at the thought of John's leaving Susan at the brink of childbirth. But John's intution, Susan's trust in his intuition, and their shared courage, created, in the long run, both a nurturing home and extraordinary support for their daughter's developing spiritual consciousness.

We may not know what the soul is up to, and it's often a long way into the story before we can even get a sniff of what it has in mind for us. If we can surrender to the fact that the soul knows what it's doing in spite of travails, confusion, and what at times may even appear to be utter insanity (as in this man's untimely departure from his wife), we can learn something important from every relationship experience. But, like John and Susan, we must have faith, courage and integrity every step of the way.

Through their experience these people all expanded their capacity for love. Susan rose to a higher love for John even as they were parting so that, together, they could both rise to a higher level of love for their spiritually gifted child. Susan's new husband was expanded by his appreciation for the gifts that only John could give his stepdaughter - a set of values missing in his own life - and his sons both opened their hearts to love a remarkable little girl.

~ Daphne Rose Kingma, The Future of Love

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What could someone do to make you happy?

http://iloveyou.gaia.com — Wed, 22 Jul 2009 17:36:53 GMT

No one can make me happy - I choose to be happy - it is a personal choice, a moment-by-moment decision. However, if someone does some things for me, I will become more happy than I already am. :)

Ways to make this happen:

Give me a nice, wonderful shoulder and neck massage.

Give me a compliment.

Buy my book - better yet, buy more than one, buy 2, 3 or 10 - for you and your friends!

You can buy it here:

http://www.lulu.com/content/5993930

Tags: QaR, happiness, joy, others, friends

Great News! I have made my own youtube videos for the first time!

http://iloveyou.gaia.com — Wed, 22 Jul 2009 09:01:27 GMT

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H-HlzKaJR_g

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B7veFcfJx1s

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ITVfLEu1_6I

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7DwYGISJQLQ

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=02dGatfJ9OM

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Your Emotional Instrument Control Panel

http://iloveyou.gaia.com — Fri, 26 Jun 2009 15:40:55 GMT

Your Instrument Panel.

Ecstasy YOU FEEL POWERFUL UP HERE.
Joy, Bliss Your Divine Self lives up here all the time.
Knowing , Empowerment This energy is light, fast, flowing, unresisted.
Freedom
Love, Appr eciation More Expansive Energy
Passion, Eagerness, Enthusiasm
Happiness, Positive Expectation
Belief
Optimism, Confidence, I Can Do It
Hopefulness, Seeing Possibilities, Curiosity
Self Esteem, Interest, Courage
Contentment, Relaxation, Emptiness
Acceptance, Bor edom, Don't Care -------------- This is a resting zone.
Pessimism, I Give Up
Frustration, Aggravation, Impatience --------- THE TIPPING POINT-------
Overwhelm, Stressed, Hard Work --- Much of America lives here and thinks it's normal.
Disappointment
Doubt, Confusion, Uncertainty
Worry, Negative expectation
Discouragement, Quit, Fatigue
Anger --- A bridge to get your power/energy back; it blasts you upward.
Revenge
Hatred, Rage More Contracted Energy
Jealousy, Desire that feels bad, Lack
Guilt, Blame, Project on others
Fear YOU FEEL POWERLESS DOWN HERE.
Sadness, Grief, Depression The energy is slow, heavy, dense, resistant.
Shame, Unworthiness, Despair, Apathy You can't hear The Divine as well.

Every emotion on the Instrument Panel is Divine Energy at varying frequencies.

All emotions are valuable information. Appreciate them all!

Activity: Demonstrate this clearly to yourself. Get up and act out the states, from
bottom to top. This is especially useful if you are stuck, or have difficulty feeling. Physical

movement will un-stick you quickly. Stop reading and physically act out the whole range of

emotions now. Make it silly and fun and uninhibited. Which ones have more or faster energy?

Write in your journal how it felt and what you noticed.

The small self is by nature fearful, doubtful and resistant, and has no interest in giving up

control and going with the flow, but your intention to feel good and put the Large Self in the

driver's seat will prevail over time. Be gentle and compassionate with your small self, which is doing

the best it can with its limited consciousness. It is fear-based, and so might resist anything new and

unknown, just because it's new -- even if it might be better.

From your Large Self perspective, make the decision to soothe the small self and have it take a

back seat. Decide to let the Large Self fly the plane. It has the knowledge of all the instruments

and all the flight manuals and all the weather charts in the world. It has the larger perspective.

Let the Large Self fly the plane.

First priority is to get back in touch with your feelings and get your altimeter calibrated again.

Most people have gotten so used to negative emotion that they think it's normal, and pay no

attention to it. Just start feeling. Notice, "I feel this, I feel that". No fudging. You are where you are.

Just say, "This is what I feel." Just start noticing where you are on the altimeter. Don't make it bad,

it just is what it is. It's good to know where you are!

There is no bad place to be on the scale. It's all just information. Wherever you are is OK,

because from this day forward, by looking at your instrument panel, you will know how to move

up. When we're caught up in the stories we tell ourselves, about how we got where we didn't want

to be, and whose fault it is, and how powerless we are to change it, we keep creating more of that

thing that we don't want. The game is to soothe yourself and tell yourself a better "story", one that

leads even a few steps up the scale. Easy does it. One step at a time.

Truth is not the issue here. Where you are is "true" only because you created it, or you bought

into a reality someone else created. You made it true. Give it back, and create your own! You can

now create something else that is just as "true" by changing your altitude. Changing your story

about it will help you feel more powerful, and feeling powerful creates powerful realities.

The emotional scale is the instrument panel in your airplane. You check it to see where you

are, what your altitude is, how much fuel you have, which way you're headed, and what you might

need to do to adjust for a good flight, and to end up where you want to go. You don't judge the

instrument panel on your airplane as good or bad; it's just information you need. If you don't like

what you see, there's plenty of time to make adjustments. No worries.

If you can read your instrument panel, you can get anywhere. If you can't see it or don't know

how to read it, you often end up in unexpected places experiencing things you don't want, and

wondering why. Now you'll never be lost again.

Unwanted or "negative" emotions are not bad - they are useful data. They tell you where you

are, and how far you are from your Large Self. It is supposed to feel bad to be headed downward!

Your feelings will also tell you how far you've come up, so you can chart your journey.

You wouldn't ignore the map if it said you were headed in a direction you didn't want to go,

and you know that if you're pointed at San Francisco and you keep flying, you will arrive. You

wouldn't ignore your altimeter if it said you were headed for the ground. You'd adjust your altitude.

Then you'd feel just a little bit better each time it registered a lift. That little bit can save your life.

If your nose is pointed down, it's not important to get to the highest high right now - all

that's important is that the nose of your plane gets tipped up just a little bit, and that you're headed

in the general direction you want to go. Just go for a little feeling of relief. You must value small

gains. Small gains are everything.

Point your nose upward and relax.

~ Lola Jones, Things are Going Great in my Absence: How to let go and let the Divine do the Heavy Lifting

You may also like this poem that I wrote, Why We Love:

http://iloveyou.gaia.com/blog/2007/4/why-we-love-each-other

And here is where you can read more of my poetry and gain access to more of my ideas: http://www.lulu.com/content/paperback-book/experiencing-divinity-sharing-awakening/5993930

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My Personal 10 Commandments

http://iloveyou.gaia.com — Sat, 06 Jun 2009 23:55:47 GMT

1.Thou shall have sex every day, either with thyself, or with others, or both, preferably with both.

2. Thou shall love and love and love and love and love and love yourself and others, no matter what

3. Thou shall drop the story and open through any feeling.

4. Thou shall give and receive and be okay with both.

5. Thou shall hug and kiss.

6. Thou shall know thy heart virtue, express it and experience it every day.

7. Thou shall be committed to having a direct experience of Truth and desire it the way someone whose hair is on fire desires water.

8. Thou shall know you are wonderful and so is everyone.

9. Thou shall let the Wisdom within guide you every moment.

10. Thou shall be ok with disobeying the above commandments that is, thou shall feel neither guilt nor shame if thou disobeys the above commandments and if thou does, be ok with that too, and open through that feeling also.

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My Next Book Signing

http://iloveyou.gaia.com — Sat, 16 May 2009 04:50:52 GMT

Date: May 23rd, 2009.
Time: 3 to 4PM..
Location:

University of California, Irvine Student Center Room Lido Isle B
Corner of Pereira and West Peltason, Irvine, CA

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How do you keep your heart open?

http://iloveyou.gaia.com — Sun, 22 Mar 2009 19:44:02 GMT

Through being playful, meditation, prayer, visualization, chanting, singing, writing, dancing. Sometimes I also caress my own heart, and whisper, "I love you."
:)

Tags: QaR, heart, love, openness, world, compassion

Book Signing

http://iloveyou.gaia.com — Sat, 21 Mar 2009 21:29:21 GMT

I will be doing my HeartSpace Poetry Reading, Book Signing and
Mini-Workshop to celebrate the launch and publication of my book,

"Experiencing Divinity, Sharing Awakening" containing poems, prayers
and stories I wrote.

Date: March 27th

Time: 7PM to 8:30PM.

Location:

COMMON GROUND
14051 Newport Ave. H
Tustin, CA. 92780
Phone: (714) 573-2546
Bookstore (714) 573-2540
Cost: Love Offering

I am so so so very happy and so excited! :)

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Where do you see spring in your life?

http://iloveyou.gaia.com — Sat, 21 Mar 2009 21:21:46 GMT

The Birth of my New Book! Yay!

Tags: QaR, spring, march, equinox, rebirth, newness, seasons